I get a lot of guys who write in to ask me for dating advice on how to behave around women.
Many of those questions focus on the first meeting or the first date.
I thought I’d devote one entire newsletter to a concept that I feel is VITAL to understand if you’re wondering how to behave around a woman you’ve just met.
A MISTAKE ALMOST EVERY GUY MAKES
I’ve noticed a KEY difference between the way men and women act when they meet a “potential mate“.
Women usually act in a way that can be characterized like this:
“You’re interesting to me. I’d like to get to know you better, and we can see where this goes.”
Men usually act in a way that can be characterized like this:
“I am so interested in you that I’m nervous. In fact, I’m already thinking of you as a potential girlfriend or wife… or at least a one-night stand.”
In other words, women are usually casual and laid-back when they’re first meeting a guy…
But GUYS tend to act like every girl is a POTENTIAL WIFE.
As you can imagine, this creates a lot of tension and pressure.
And I’m not talking about the GOOD kind, either.
I’m talking about the kind that makes men shiver and shake with nervousness, and women feel uncomfortable because the MAN is acting uncomfortable.
I KNOW that you can relate to this in some way.
THE ANSWER
The simple dating advice here is…
DON’T DO IT.
If you start acting all freakish and nervous when you’re talking to a woman, you’re probably going to screw things up before they’ve even had a chance to get started.
Treating a woman that you’ve just met as if she very well could be the love of your life is something you should NEVER do.
Instead, take a very different approach.
My favorite is to ASSUME that every woman has SOMETHING that’s going to annoy me, bother me, or SCREW UP HER CHANCES with me.
The MAIN reason that I do this…
SURPRISE…
IS THAT IT’S TRUE!
Duh.
The fact is that MOST women are NOT compatible “long term” with most men.
In other words, there if you do get into a long-term relationship with a particular woman, the chances are that she’s going to have things about her that you don’t like.
One of my favorite Cocky & Funny themes to follow is
“You’re screwing up your chances with me”.
Let’s say I’m walking down the street with a girl to have a cup of tea. Let’s assume that she and I just met the night before, I got her number, and now we’re walking from my place to tea.
On the way in the door to the coffee shop, she trips over the doorway.
I might look at her, shake my head in an “overly dramatic fake annoyed” way, and say “This relationship just isn’t going to work“.
Then, let’s say fifteen minutes later she spills her tea on the table and herself.
I’ll shake my head again and say,
“What did I tell you about this kind of behavior?”.
In other words, I’m communicating the very OPPOSITE of “You’re a potential wife“. I’m saying “I’m so comfortable around you that I can even make fun of you without caring what you think of me“.
Does this sound a little crazy?
Good. It should.
But trust me.
If you spend a couple of hours having regular, normal conversation… being Cocky & Funny, enjoying yourself, NOT trying to impress her, and generally demonstrating that you could care less how things turn out, you’ll be FAR more likely to take things further than if you act as if she might be the love of your life and you wind up acting so nervous, stilted, and DUMB that she runs away.
So here it is your bit of dating advice… one thing that most guys who are unsuccessful with women do that screws things up… one thing to AVOID:
DON’T TREAT A WOMAN YOU’VE JUST MET AS IF SHE’S A POTENTIAL FUTURE WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND.
Instead, lean back. Be cool. Make jokes about her screwing up her chances with you. Tell her that she’s a nice friend. Assume that she has qualities that are going to annoy you, then point them out (in a Cocky & Funny way, of course).
Don’t lose your composure. It can be fatal if you do.
Another bit of dating advice:
Most guys don’t “get” women.
And, unfortunately, most guys look for tricks and “pick up lines” when it comes time to LEARN how to meet women.
They don’t realize that all the tricks in the world aren’t going to help them if they don’t UNDERSTAND what’s “going on“.
That’s where my free dating advice newsletter comes in, along with my eBook, “Double Your Dating“…
The first portion of the book is entirely focused on your “Inner Game“. In other words, it’s focused on helping you “get” what’s going on.
This book goes into DEPTH about all aspects of psychology and behavior of men and women… and teaches you from the ground up. You must get rid of some of your bad programming before you can get GOOD programming.
You will get pages and pages of me teaching everything from the ground up on how to take things all the way from beginning to end… from the first meeting through the first date… all the way to the bedroom, and beyond.
You’ll get dating advice on how to overcome your limiting beliefs about women… how to eliminate your fears of talking to women… how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you, even if you don’t have money or looks, etc.
In other words, it’s a complete system.
You’ll learn everything you need to know in order to start meeting and dating more women IMMEDIATELY.
All the details, and some great free samples are here… check it out:
Free Dating Advice Newsletter And Download eBook
And I’ll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
Author Credit
Since 2001, David DeAngelo has helped over 10 million men improve their success with women. His programs teach men how to overcome their fear of rejection, successfully meet and attract women, and become the kind of man who can be in a successful relationship with a high quality, beautiful woman.
He is the defacto leader for dating advice for men on the Internet. Virtually ever competitor refers to ‘David D.’ as setting the standards in this niche, both in the ideas he teaches and his market penetration.
He has a tremendously loyal following online – his readers love the fact that he’s a “man’s man”, and an example of a “cool guy” who also has deep integrity. New readers quickly view him as the big brother they never had.
David DeAngelo is the author of “Double Your Dating - What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women”, and has taught thousands of men how to be more successful with women and dating.
©2010 David DeAngelo Communications Inc, DDCI All Rights Reserved. “Double Your Dating” and “David DeAngelo” are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.
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