His Silence Is Driving You Crazy…So Why Would A Guy Ignore You?


Aside from everything listed here – some guys are not ignoring to play hard to get. Some men actually have trouble paying the right attention to you.

Don’t you hate it when the passive aggressive man gets under your skin?

How about when you really do like him but for some reason his silence drives you crazy?

It may be even be the one thing you don’t like about him.

Whether his mysterious silence tugs on your natural curiosity or pisses you off because it all seems so pointless, you can not help to wonder…

WHY – Why would a guy ignore you?

We all can agree male – female interaction is almost always often situation based.

Meaning your husband ignoring or withdrawing,  you might be different than some guy at work you’re friends with. Or your new boyfriend goes silent at certain times and other times he talks your ear off.

Or when you’re out trying your best to meet a single guy – the ones who catch your eye seem to ignore you.

And let’s not forget about the guy who’s into you one minutes then ignores you completely to flirt with your friends or when he’s with his buddies it’s like you don’t even exist.

Men don’t go silent unless there’s a reason. But and this is a big but – never forget some men go silent or only appear to ignore because they literally have nothing to say AND they’re comfortable in the silence.

If you’re in a troubled relationship he might ignore you because he knows it pisses you off. Or he’s had a bad day and doesn’t want to talk about it.

Either way the wrong kind of pressure or the wrong type of communication in this circumstance will only make the problem worse.

Sometime guys get bad advice.

They believe you rope a woman in, ignore her, and she’ll want you more. So in this case it means he likes you but really doesn’t understand how things are supposed to work.

But keep in mind that does work for lots of men – at least in getting your attention or curiosity. So to some guys if it’s worked before they’ll continue the same tactics on every woman until they find one it works on.

It could be he’s not interested and believes the best way to make you go away is to ignore you. He doesn’t want to hurt your feelings or he’s not good with confrontation.

This usually happens when a woman gets too aggressive, needy, or pushes a guy into a corner. He’ll avoid that corner to avoid having to “small talk” his way out of the situation. He’ll be pleasant and nice but you’ll find he’ll ignore you every chance he gets.

To him it’s just easier that way.

Now some of you will NOT like a guy but he’ll get the wrong picture. He may not understand that’s who you are. You talk to everybody and in your mind it means nothing more than a conversation.

Another reason a particular man may ignore you is because he’s not very good with women.

I know – not good with women???!! It’s true and unfortunately it happens all too often.

You see he gets nervous around you. He’s very shy and perhaps even borderline introverted. He could be so insecure just the thought of talking to you causes a severe case of lock-jaw.

He might even fear that if he opens his mouth he could literally scare you away.

One more reason comes to mind and this is where your friend, boyfriend, or some guy you’re dating always seems to ignore you ONLY when he’s with other people.

They could be his family – “He’s probably worried you won’t approve of them.” And in some rare cases he’s worried they won’t approve of you.

They could be his friends – “He hates acting like a boyfriend in front of them. It makes him feel less manly.” We can call him Mister DPD – or Mister Dual Personality Dude. 🙂

One last case is he’s a really nice guy and feels sort of embarrassed or refuses to chase, hit on, or flirt with a woman. We can call him “Mister NDD or  – Nice and Differently Disabled.

Shhh…that was me and I’ll explain next.

Now some of you might be asking why a guy like me would ignore you?

(Assuming you DO know I teach guys how to attract women…and not how to ignore you to play hard to get.)

First I must explain it was mostly because I saw how many “other” guys were up your ass all the time trying to “get in your pants” and the I refused to be anything like them.

So why they are “playing tag” with you I was dreaming you would eventually come to me.

You got to love the past.  Actually I will still do that but my reasons are completely different. Ask below and I’ll try to explain

Unfortunately this dreaming only left me, or stuck me with having a friendly conversation when no one was around. This is a typical nice guy way of dealing with the “I don’t want to be like those jerks” dilemma. Mister NDD.

Me now – if I ignore you it’s because:

  • I don’t enjoy talking to you – friendly or not. (Very rare.)
  • You’re all over me and I’m not interested. (Very common.)

The number one reason, believe it or not – It’s all in your head.

I’m not ignoring you. I’m just living my life. Sometimes our paths will cross. Sometimes they won’t.

Unless you really catch my eye or you’re a blast to be around I won’t make of an effort to spark up a conversation.

Of course that does not include waitresses, cashiers, or any friendly public “service” worker who does her job quite well. If I ignore you then it’s probably because I’m “out of it” totally, engrossed in a conversation with someone else, or you’re doing a terrible job.

You have to understand men who are or appear to be naturally successful attracting women usually don’t make women a priority.

It may appear you’re being ignored when in reality you’re over-thinking the situation.

I see it happen to lots of guys and with women it’s no different. They somehow believe she is doing something, anything, pondering or even fantasizing about him because they either caught each other’s eyes or talked once. (I promise to talk more about that later because it really is a huge deal.)

For this post never assume he is doing something to you and you’ll increase your chance at meeting some incredible guys.

Because now you know – if he’s ignoring for his benefit or yours…

Then in a small but effective way to him – his life revolves around the female form, shape or existence and sometimes that’s going to be you.

Take a quick second the next time a guy ignores you and consider what I’ve told you. I believe you’ll be pleasantly surprised and depending on the situation you’ll know the real reason why a guy ignores you.

But hey – Don’t forget to tell me about it.  I’d enjoy that. So no ignoring me on this post or I’ll be really upset. Grrrr!! 😀

Are you looking for more reasons why guys do, say, or act the way they do?

Please check out my absolutely free “Why Do Guys…?” for more great info on men. All me 🙂

All original. Get the inside scoop on men straight from a man.

Here’s a little something related to this question:

Man Ignoring Woman She Unhappy

You’ll never believe all the reasons why a guy will ignore a woman. Some of them are absolutely absurd.

Thanks for stopping by – Peter White Why Do Guys…?

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279 comments… add one
  • gerard

    i work in a bank doing cover for another work colleague . there is a really nice girl and I mean nice in the way she treats you . I was up the stairs one morning and they were having there usuall work meetings they do . workers and managers to. I was in the hall way to the kitchen when I was called out now coinsider there was 12 workers and 2 managers . one of the managers said to me Gerard aren’t you in love with me . I was really gobsmacked to say the least . but the truth be told I am in love with her . I replyed back theres no poinbt me telling you . you got it right . to my surprise now this was in front of 14 people her reply was I fing love you for that I love u we pet . by this stage id dissapeard back to were I was . I could hear the conversation her telling them all that she was in love with me to and that I am a really nice guy and make her feel good when we talk . I couldn’t wait to get out of there after that day .now it don’t end there how ironic it was me that was asked for to go do the cover all the time after that day . I’m still not to sure what to think as you said about silence . this girl has been silent on a few occasions from this . recently I was there and I went up the stairs and she was standing there talking to another girl she turned around an looked wen I was up . never said hi or how are you Gerard . an hour later I was oput getting some it to eat in a grociers near there and she was there to came past me at the door said hi gerard . so you see how strange this is in haven’t done any thing about it . but ive been told if it keeps going on it will evently end up kissing both of us haha I hope this is true tbh

  • Sophia

    Pete, I’m so confused and heartbroken over what men are doing… 2 months ago I met a guy working for the same company. We met outside of work, at a social event. I was not prepared, I was exhausted and had the worst looks ever. Yet, he ran at me and insisted soooo much that I stayed for the night. Like, I never saw a man insist so much! I had to leave eventually… He gave me a peck on my lips and later sent me a message about how I should really be there and that he’d come after me to the edge of the world. Of course I did not fall for such words – too much, too quick!! But I was polite and agreed to have a date the next day. He contacted me early in the morning but we had less than one hour together, due to work commitments. He made even bigger plans for us, gave me another peck on the lips, then… I heard NOTHING of him! I messaged to ask if the plan is still up but he said he had a car crash and spent many hours at the police. The way he explained it seemed genuine. However, the next day I had to leave back to my city… Fast forward 2 months later, I’m back and we meet at the office. He flirts a lot, compliments me, I do the same. However, I had to leave his side and ignore him on many occasions due to the nature of the work and to my supervisor having his eyes on me. Yet, he came around a few times to tell me how good I look in my work attire or to ask how it’s going. At the end of the day we said a quick bye. Later i texted him to ask what he meant about a specific thing he said. He never replied……….. We are still Fb friends. It’s not hard for him to reach my city (nor for me to reach his), so I don’t think distance is necessarily an issue. Plus, we work for the same company… and we have a very similar background, with passions & hobbies and all that (btw, he GUESSED some incredible things about myself – there was no clue at all for him to know, he just felt it within the first 5 minutes). It really hurts that he ignored my text after he appeared so smitten with me. I feel I was too powerful that day, I played with him a little, I maybe talked to much to other colleagues, seemed too confident and thus made him insecure (although deep inside I’m not). He seems the shy type regularly, troubled, critical of women with a big ego, perhaps really insecure of himself… and not the type who would get a lot of attention from females. But I like him. And I thought he liked me. I fear he might be scared of the competition and intimidated because I feel so good in this industry/company and I’m looking and feeling like a total “10”. Or is he just a jerk?…

    • Peter White


      Sounds like he’s all talk and no real action. Too many compliments. Too many promises with nothing to show for it. The thing is – what he’s doing or did worked on you so I’d be careful. Whether he’s playing a game or just aloof or doesn’t have the “balls” to follow through with anything doesn’t matter. What matters is – no action! And if you’re getting the feelings he’s insecure, worried about competition, or he’s intimated by you are not good signs when combined together with the lack of action.

      What will happen is YOU will have to be doing all the work, taking the leads, and following through to what he says he will do. This is generally not a good start. Be cautious. That’s all.

      Best of luck to you,

      • Sophia

        Pete, thank you so much for reading and replying! I appreciate it so much!
        I am in no way contacting this guy again. One text left without a reply is enough for me. He clicks on my posts on social media but no action from him…

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