Man or woman – we have experienced the approach and have shown an invested interest in it.
What’s you opinion – here’s mine.
If you’ve been rejected then you know how it feels… You approach an attractive women and she snubs you.
She tells you to go away, or puts her hand up saying she’s not interested. Maybe she even tells you quickly that she already has a boyfriend.
Then there’s the circumstance where she does talk to you but the one word answers and total lack of “caring” makes you feel like you want to slither away and hide.
I say attractive women because you might not approach too many women you’re not attracted to and otherwise – you have yet to meet one “average-looking girl” who acts this.
This stigma – sometimes known as a “bitch shield” or how about the “Prima Donna Syndrome” is just that…
A mark to some women because of guys having bad experiences trying to meet beautiful women.
it’s sad to see this mark usually gives a distinct difference for a woman to follow.
“Men don’t approach me so I must not be pretty.” or
“I must be average because guys don’t talk to me.”
So for a woman to suddenly be seen as attractive must bear this new burden of walking around in public and never having privacy again.
Is it a time saver?
Is every man who catches a glimpse of her drawn like a magnet so in her goal to just get on with her day caused her to withdraw from this time old ritual.
Is it to stay private?
Does she feel the eyes of men are just another “Paparazzi” camera click. Invading her life. Making her feel like no matter where she goes – she can never be left alone.
Is it the common assumption that when a guy approaches you he only wants one thing?
As if Mister Random Player picks up hot women on the street and wants her bent over in some nearby hotel room – within hours.
From her eyes…
“Well guys are rude. Some are creepy. They stare at me like I’m a piece of meat. They wait forever to approach and when they do it’s usually a pick up line or a lame Hello followed by some Gibberish.”
In either case I’ve found most single men and women have strong opinions not on the pick up game in general but on the simple task of the approach.
Guys with bad experiences blame it on her. ..
“I just wanted to talk to her and she treated me like some loser. Or pretended not to notice. Or so casually blew me off and then laughed about it with her friends. They won’t even give me a chance!!”
Girls with bad experiences blame it on him…
“He was rude. I’m just not interested in meeting strange men and they just don’t seem to get it. He only wants my phone number anyways so he can bug me more. He’s like all the other guys, because I like to look good they think it means I want to meet every guy…. As if I can’t find a guy on my own!!!!”
My personal results in approaching women are varied…
Some I stammered and blew it quickly. Some she wasn’t very responsive. But then I learned a little on how to do it and suddenly the results were much different.
They all were not prefect or worked out the best but the experiences went much smoother. She laughed. We laughed. We talked. They became more about just meeting someone and not approaching blindly with no thought in my pants that she – “Is so freaking hot!”
I learned how to time it better. How to spot the more approachable and not bother with the rest. That helped tremendously. I learned how to be a little more flirty and less aggressive. I learned not to stare for an hour or linger around too long – so as not to creep her out.
This shifted my mind from believing it was an impossible skill or pick up move to something very do-able and rather enjoyable too.
The worst thing that happened was being ignored and the best was – well lets just say, ended up in a very comfortable place… her bed.
Hey man, what about you?
Does the mere thought of approaching women piss you off, make you nervous, get under your skin, make you feel helpless, or is it something which comes natural to you?
Do you have fun with it or do you absolutely dread it?
Have you had any experiences guys should be warned about?
A story to tell or a really good tale of seduction to share.
What about the “ladies in the audience” ?
Are you approached a lot? Not enough.
Have your experiences ended in drama, fun times, or nothing special at all?
Do you have a preconceived notion or stigma attached to guys who do try to pick you up? At least that’s what it feels like.
Do you want to be approach more or less?
How would you like to be approached?
Is there something you wish ALL men would do when they first meet you – which would make it all go smoother?
I’m not sure if it’s good writing to leave more questions than answers but that’s because I want to hear from every side on this.
Part of me wants to see where I stand in all this. Which side I choose or not choose.
Part of me wants to figure a better way to communicate.
To get more girls and guys talking.
To be the “Hook Up” guy and get more of you meeting – more of the opposite sex.
Part of me wants the sordid stories to read. Feel the love. Feel the anger. Laugh a little. Cover my eyes in disgust.
It’s all entertaining no matter how you look at it and I love to be entertained just like you.
After all – if meeting people was just a matter of entertaining yourself and letting him or her join in – wouldn’t it all be a lot easier leaving us more time to get along with it – and really connect.