Is Competing With Others The Real Secret To Being More Attractive?

in Attraction Laws, Men, Women
Run Competition Be More Attractive

Written by Peter White – Creator of Why Do Guys…? & DiaLteG TM.

Laws of Attraction #5: Resist the urge to compete with others by learning to live in each moment & how it can make you successful.

In the world of attraction, it seems most try to be more attractive than others as to gain an edge on the so-called competition.

It makes logical sense, defeat your competition by being “better” than them in any way possible.

Nature may have bestowed upon us this urge to beat out our competition to better procreate, survive, and thrive long enough to reproduce, plus to assure our reproductions last long enough to do the same but, it’s not always the right path to take when there are few better PRODUCTIVE ways to increase the odds in our favor.

These means of positive production satisfy both the internal and external making it far superior and longer-lasting too.

The point I intend to make disregards competition in the typical way we see it, and focuses more on oneself so both areas are covered:

Building a more secure internal self and an easily recognized external view from those we wish to attract.

Focusing on the competition may be a waste of our limited energy and resources.

In competitive arenas there is no guarantee that the best will win. Other factors are at play which will be “presently” more relevant to the event.

I’ve seen many of a better team fail because at the time in which they needed to succeed, they were sadly not the best they could be in that moment.

With so many factors at play, prediction, or prediction of a certainty which appeared a given, has proven false and misleading because, what really mattered, what separated defeat from success happened in the moment and not in the preparation leading to those pivotal moments.

Sure – preparation is a key ingredient. It does help and has proven itself to play an important role in the outcome.

But it’s NEVER enough.

There are OTHER factors in play which are more directly relevant to the event.

I found myself in a typical “American” situation one day watching my Boston Red Sox down to the last moments of defeat.

It was assured and based on past results I had given up hope for success to finally beat the Yankees and move on to the world series with a  vindication of our long awaited championship I  have never seen, because the last happened so long ago.

This moment was more that typical. We ALWAYS failed. They ALWAYS beat us. We ALWAYS were let down just when we felt hopeful and filled with joy that our drought was finally over.

Yet – as I perched on the edge of my couch – deflated and sullen, close to just turning it off and resuming with my life… it happened.

ONE MAN had a different plan. He wasn’t so eager to give up. He had something in his heart, mind, body, and soul which didn’t allow him to be defeated once again like his predecessors:

“Seven Red Sox batters proceeded to come to the plate in that ninth inning. It started when Rivera walked Kevin Millar. Dave Roberts pinch-ran for him, and after Rivera threw over to first a few times, Roberts took off for second — beating Jorge Posada’s throw to Derek Jeter. Bill Mueller then singled, tying the score and forcing extra innings. In the bottom of the 12th, with the game more than five hours old, ALCS MVP David Ortiz homered off Paul Quantrill and kept Boston’s hopes alive.

Rivera blew another 4-3 lead the following night, allowing a Jason Varitek sac fly to score Roberts from third with the tying run.

Fast-forward to the 14th inning, and Big Papi did it again, this time with a walk-off single against Esteban Loaiza, scoring Damon. The Yankees now had a 3-2 series lead, which still seemed safe. A common theme was emerging, as FOX continually showed Red Sox fans in clear agony, bracing for the worst, hating the Yankees, but still believing in the impossible dream.

(…)

It was never in doubt after that. The Comeback was complete.

Ortiz hit a two-run homer in the top of the first off Kevin Brown, and Damon drilled a grand slam in the second, for a quick, 6-0 lead. The Red Sox clinched with a 10-3 victory, becoming the first MLB team to overcome a 3-0 series deficit.”

Postseason History – 2004 Red Sox & Yankees

My poor neighbors downstairs, which I later learned one was also a true Sox fan like me, him and his wife must’ve flinched at the sound of me, alone, jumping on my couch in those final few moments of victory.

It was a pivotal time in my life, but it was also a moment of revelation.

This was not a competition based on the logical definition of the word. Something else was at play which deemed and proved itself in those final moments…

Being better or stronger or beating the other team wasn’t WHY it all happened the way it did.

I believed it happened because a group of people took every moment, every second, every thought, every precise ticked time of reality and treated it as such with total disregard for outcome and/or success.

It wasn’t about beating the Yankees because in TRYING, they would’ve probably failed.

It was about SEPARATING themselves from the outcome as if it didn’t matter because win or lose, in each moment they lived through – they gave it all…

AND THAT IS WHAT MADE THEM SO SUCCESSFUL!

Moments matter more than anything.

Sure, preparation is good, education is amazing, learning is essential, BUT none of that guarantees success, because success just… happens.

It’s the moment to moment we live in that makes the bigger difference.

It’s the mindset and ability to ignore the outcome, and quite possibility to not give a shit either way; knowing full-well, no matter what happens, we’ve gone the distance. We stayed until the end.

Our attractiveness to others will always be felt in those moments.

If we live them, each one, as best we can, and thrive in the process not caring what it MAY bring or give to us…

We become more attractive.

We effortlessly draw others unto us as they know in their hearts, it must feel amazing, “Please inspire me to feel this way!!!” they beg, plead, think or state in their devotion as if it’s some bright light to them beckoning in the dark distance.

This IS the more productive way.

You don’t have to beat your competition.

You don’t have to be better than them.

You don’t have to relinquish your internal power and succumb to their power to which you may deem stronger than you.

You merely have to LIVE – survive the moment.

Inspire others to join you.

Second to second is where LIFE is because you can not live any place else but there.

AND living there IS and will ALWAYS be the most attractive to others.

Being an attractive person is NOT a competition.

It’s not who wins and who loses…

It’s about having and cultivating the ability to just LIVE and enjoying it from moment to moment, AND taking full advantage of that enlightenment so you can pass it onto others to feel it with you.

THIS is a not rule or law of attraction, no matter how hard I try to relate to it to help you better get there; it’s just ME – living through each word as if they are moments I pass through – and I do believe you’ll be attracted to it because you DO want to feel it, and live it, and breath it in, and revel in this present state of mind while experiencing every last bit of life you can… before it all fades away.

You’re going to die some day and so will I too.

Life is not a competition.

Attracting others or being more attractive is also not a competition.

If death is a loss, which it feels like it mostly is, we’re ALL going to lose eventually.

So why not step up to the plate…

Look at the world with a keen sense of knowing it’s either a fast ball, a curve ball, a knuckle ball, a strike, a ball, and it’s just doesn’t matter.

What matters more are the FEELINGS we get to enjoy and live in those moments and not the result of failure or success.

INSPIRE others to join you by just BEING that person.

STOP competing.

STOP trying to win.

Be.

Live.

Inspire.

Make them laugh, cry, sing, and feel… something.

For the sole reason of because, that’s who you are.

And you WILL be more attractive to anyone, anywhere, anytime.

People are always looking for it.

They then will always be looking for YOU.

Photo by:  RUN 4 FFWPU found at Pexels.

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